


It's Already Gone

by salutarykitten



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Almost made myself cry, F/F, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-23
Updated: 2020-04-23
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:47:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23801044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/salutarykitten/pseuds/salutarykitten
Summary: The war is over.  Horde Prime has been defeated.  It's been months since the final battle, and there's something important left on Adora's to-do list: reconciling with Catra.
Relationships: Adora & Catra (She-Ra), Adora/Catra (She-Ra), Adora/Glimmer (She-Ra), Catra/Scorpia (She-Ra)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 35





	It's Already Gone

“Hey, Adora.” Glimmer smiled at Adora as she walked towards Bright Moon’s gate. “Where are you off to?” There were several regiments behind Glimmer, soldiers helping along caravans and transports filled with the wounded from Prime’s final assault.

Adora closed her eyes. She willed her body to stop shaking. “I’m going to talk to Catra.”

“Oh.” Glimmer looked down at the ground. “How are you feeling about that?”

Adora took a deep breath. “It’s fine. I’ve been putting it off for too long.”

Glimmer placed a hand on Adora’s arm. “Adora. You don’t have to do this. I’ve forgiven Catra, but you don’t have to. You can be honest with me.”

Adora’s breath got shaky as she tried to hold back tears. “You don’t understand, Glimmer. I loved her. No, I still love her. I know that what happened wasn’t my fault, but I still feel awful. What happened to your Mom… If I had just trusted Catra. If I had defended her to Shadow Weaver, maybe none of this would’ve happened. Maybe Catra wouldn’t be struggling with all the issues she has.

Glimmer grasped Adora’s other arm. “You were a child, Adora. You can’t be held responsible. Maybe you didn’t handle what Shadow Weaver did in the best way, but you were so young. You were scared and defenceless. Even if you had stood up to Shadow Weaver, who knows what would’ve happened? She could’ve killed you.”

“I know. I know that, Glimmer, but I keep blaming myself.” Adora wiped a tear from her eye. “I don’t know how this is going to go, but I have to try.”

Glimmer squeezed Adora so tight she thought she might burst. “Be safe, Adora. I love you. If anything happens, you know you can contact me. I’m here for you. Bow too.”

Adora smiled, embracing Glimmer. “Thank you.” And then she let go.

\---

Catra was sitting at the sea gate, staring out into the ocean. “Hey Adora.”

“Hey Catra.” It felt like it’d been so long. She wanted to reach out and touch her, just to make sure she was real. She didn’t. “How are you?”

Catra lifted up her metal arm, sun glinting off it. “I barely feel it anymore. Sometimes I reach out and try to grab my arm, and get shocked when this thing is in its place.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault. If anyone’s to blame, it’s me. Horde Prime never would’ve gotten here if I hadn’t opened that portal.”

“You never would’ve opened that portal if I had respected you. If I didn’t constantly talk down to you. If I had given you the tiniest amount of respect.”

Catra laughed. “Wow, if you’d said all that back when you were begging me to leave with you, maybe I would’ve actually come.”

“Really?”

“I don’t know. It would’ve been pretty out of character, honestly.” Adora winced. “Whatever. We could do this all day. If Shadow Weaver wasn’t a psychotic piece of shit. If Micah hadn’t helped her summon that demon. If Hordak didn’t wipe out half of Etheria. If Horde Prime wasn’t a megalomaniac who made a million clones of himself.” Catra picked up a rock and threw it out at the ocean. It skipped a few times before sinking.

“I’m so sorry, Catra. I’m so, so…” Adora felt about to burst into tears as Catra’s metal hand brushed Adora’s arm.

“I’m not mad at you anymore. Adora.” A tear fell down Adora’s cheek. “Adora.” Her head jerked up to look at Catra. “I almost killed Glimmer’s mom. I almost blew up the entire planet. I allowed Horde Prime to murder countless people.”

“You saved Glimmer. You sacrificed everything to stop Prime.”

“He was only here because of me, Adora. Maybe you messed up, but we were five. Shadow Weaver tortured both of us. I was so wrapped up in her head games that I couldn’t see straight. I don’t even know what happened. As soon as you said Shadow Weaver was with you, everything faded. The things I did…” Catra laughed. “I never showed it, but I really did care about Entrapta. She won’t talk to me. I don’t think she ever will.” Catra turned to look at Adora again. “Not everything is your fault, Adora. You need to accept that.”

“I never thought you’d be trying to defend me.”

Catra closed her eyes, sinking into her legs. “I’m sorry, Adora. I messed up. I had no right to treat you the way I did. Sometimes I remember what happened in the portal. It’s all vague and mashed up, but…” Catra sniffed. “I was horrible to you.”

“We both did things we regret.”

“You didn’t nearly blow up the planet.”

“I did, actually. Did you forget?”

Catra smirked. “That was Glimmer’s fault.”

Adora sighed. “Salineas finally reopened. They’ve had this curfew in place for decades, since the Horde invaded. You wanna go around and see the sights?” Adora stood up, reaching her hand down to Catra.

Catra smirked. “Sure. Sounds great.”

Salineas was bustling with activity. It was almost unnerving after seeing it deserted so many times. “Catra, have you heard of this thing? It’s called ice cream, it’s crazy, they take milk, from a COW, and then they-”

Catra couldn’t stop laughing. “I’ve heard of ice cream, Adora. I didn’t just freeze in amber after you left.”

Adora laughed. “Yeah, of course not. I’ll buy you some.”

“I can’t stand the stuff.”

Adora gaped at her. “Really? It’s so good, Catra, c’mon, you’ve gotta try-”

“Adora!” Catra groaned. “I said I don’t want any.” Adora’s eyes drooped as she tried to keep a frown off her face. “You can have some if you want. I don’t care.”

“No, it’s not the same if we’re not both having some.”

“Whatever. Let’s keep going.” Catra waved her on. As they walked, they saw two mermaids holding hands.

“It’s nice to see the people of Salineas so happy.” Adora smiled at Catra, whose expression was neutral.

“Yeah.”

“After everything that happened-”

“After everything I did. Prime didn’t touch Salineas. This was all me.”

“I mean, they were hiding before you started killing-” Adora stopped midsentence. “After you took over, or… y’know.”

“I don’t remember things being like this.” Catra stared around the town.

“I mean, things were pretty hectic the last two times you were here.”

“I wasn’t talking about Salineas, Adora.”

Adora scrunched her eyebrows. “What were you talking about?”

“Nothing, Adora. Don’t worry about it.”

Adora stopped, then ran to catch up after Catra had gone a few steps ahead of her. Why did this feel so uncomfortable? “Oh, this is great, Catra, a party!” There were tents with ribbons and a rainbow of flags strewn around. Merpeople were eating, talking, dancing, shooting darts…

“The Annual Salineas Ocean Festival. Used to have them all the time before the Horde invaded.”

Adora grunted. “How do you know about that?”

“Scorpia finally put me through Force Captain Orientation.”

Adora laughed, running her hand through her hair. “Oh yeah, Scorpia. How’s she doing?”

“Great.”

“Really? You two are all patched up?”

“It’s pretty hard to unpatch things with Scorpia.”

Adora smirked. “Yeah, that makes a lot of sense.”

“You know Scorpia?”

“Well, kind of.” Adora squinted. “We talked a bit, during the fighting. She was so scared when Prime had you.”

“You weren’t?” Catra leaned against a building. She was holding her hand against her force captain badge. Crazy that she was still wearing it.

“Of course I was!”

“The last time we’d seen each other before I got kidnapped, you tried to kill me.”

“That’s not true. I never would’ve killed you, ever, I never…”

“That wasn’t fair, Adora.” She placed a hand on her. Catra placed her hand against her own chest, pressing down hard on it. “We can go to the festival. I’m sorry.”

“No, I’m sorry. Let’s go.” Adora smiled. They ran off. “Oh, Catra, this one’s so fun, you’re blindfolded and you have mermaid tail…”

“It sounds great. Let’s do that one.” She patted Adora on the back.

“Wait, what about the other ones? You should hear about all of them before you make a choice.”

Catra sighed. “We have all the time in the world, Adora. We can do as many as you want.”

And so they did. They played Mermaid blindfold, they broke open a pinata, they watched a shadow play, water gymnastics. They even learned a dance. Almost like nothing had ever happened.

“This is nice, Catra.” The sun was starting to set.

“Yeah.” Catra placed her hand on her chest again. “It’s getting late.”

“Catra, you…” Adora closed her eyes and thought back to a breathing technique Spinerella taught her.

“Adora, are you okay? Are you dying? Please don’t be dying. God, humans are weird.”

“I’m not dying! I’m fine.” Adora grabbed Catra’s hand, the still feline one. “Catra. Come back to Bright Moon with me.”

Catra’s hair stood up on end. “What? What are you talking about? Adora, that’s not-”

“We have so much to clean up after Prime’s invasion, all these new planets we need to make diplomatic ties with. We can do it together. You’re so clever, you’re so good at manipulation and-”

Catra threw Adora’s hands off. “You apologize and apologize and cry and beg and you never change. You still haven’t changed, Adora.”

“Catra, no, what are you talking about? I changed. I respect you now, I know what I did wrong!”

Catra’s whole body heaved as she took a deep breath. “I don’t want to do this, Adora. I forgive you. I overreacted, and I can never make up for what I did-”

“You have made up for it, Catra! You saved everyone. You saved me. All this time I was trying to save you and I was the one who needed to be saved, Catra! I should’ve seen that, but-”

“SHUT UP!” Catra puffed up, forcing Adora to take a step back. “God, we’ve already had this conversation, Adora. Three times. You can come with me, Catra! I know you’re not a bad person, Catra. I had no right to do what I did. I had no right to treat you that way. But this isn’t working. We don’t work.”

Adora hadn’t noticed that she was crying. “But I love you, Catra.”

“I’m dating Scorpia.”

“That’s not what I meant. I didn’t mean that, I meant, I completely meant, you know I didn’t mean that, Catra!”

“You never let me talk, Adora! If you’d just let me talk, if you’d just let me ask what was going on, but no, let’s go Catra, I’m gonna kidnap you, Catra!”

“That’s not fair. We had plenty of time to talk in the Crystal Castle, and you clammed up-”

“Because you wouldn’t shut up about saving me, protecting me! What was I supposed to say? I was supposed to believe you’d suddenly stop treating me like I was some kind of monster?”

“I never treated you like you were a monster.”

“You’re kind of disrespectful. Do you remember saying that? You said that about the person who tortured me, told me I was garbage, insulted me day in and day out!”

“I didn’t know, I was stupid, I-”

“This isn’t how I wanted this to go.” Catra wiped away a tear.

“Wanted what to go?” Catra sat down on the ground. “Wanted what to go? Catra? Catra?”

“I’m leaving.” She whispered.

Adora blinked, took a step back, adjusted her hair. “Leaving? Where?”

“Scorpia and I are taking one of Prime’s ships. When we were in the Crimson Waste together, we… I felt like I’d found what I wanted in life. But I was stupid, and I threw it away for you.”

“You can’t go, you can’t-”

“Please stop telling me what I can’t do.” Catra stood up, and grabbed Adora’s hands. “I’m sorry for yelling.”

Adora started crying again. She knew nothing she would say mattered, and the right thing to do was to stop, but she couldn’t help herself. If she said nothing, Catra would leave forever. “Catra, please. I know you’d be great out there. You’re amazing. I never said it, but you’ve always impressed me.”

“What am I going to do on Etheria, Adora? Entrapta hates me. We can’t even talk to each other without…” Catra sighed. “Our relationship wasn’t healthy, Adora. I love you, but it wasn’t. It was based on this weird bond Shadow Weaver forced us to have. It wasn’t meant to be.”

“Catra, no, please, please don’t do this.”

“Adora, sometimes people know each other for a short time.” Catra placed her metal hand on Adora’s cheek. “I love you, and you love me. I’ll never stop loving you. I’m glad we had this time, and I’m glad I apologized. I almost wish you hadn’t. I’m always going to care about you, and I’ll always have a piece of you inside me. Sometimes people come into your life, and they change it and make it better. That doesn’t mean we’re destined to be together, or star-crossed lovers. We were together for some time, and now we’re not.”

Adora could barely see Catra through her tears. “Catra. Don’t.” She barely got the words out. She felt like she was choking. Catra hugged her.

“Catra! Catra, oh my god, I’m so sorry, the tracker stopped working and-” Scorpia’s voice came from behind Adora. She noticed that Adora’s force captain badge was blinking. How had she not noticed that? “Oh, wait, sorry, uh, the horde soldiers are revolting! Reuniting under Hordak! They said you’re the only one they’d listen to, and-”

“Cut the act, Scorpia. Just give Adora and me a moment.” Adora heard Scorpia shuffling backwards.

“You didn’t want to see me. You hated the thought of seeing me so much you had Scorpia ready to parachute you out of here.”

“I was just scared. Adora.” Catra’s feline hand touched the back of Adora’s head. “I want to say goodbye. I just wanted to apologize and make amends.”

“So did I.”

“I don’t have any ill feelings towards you anymore. I’m sorry that we fought. I’m always going to care about you.”

“Me too.”

“But we just don’t fit. We’re like two broken puzzle pieces.” Catra snorted. “And I’ll come back and visit. We’ll see each other again.”

“I’ve missed you so much, Catra.”

“You’ve missed a ghost.” Adora dry sobbed. “But I’ve missed your ghost, too.”

“Wait. Wait, one more thing. Entrapta invented this thing, you-” Adora took a deep breath. “I’m sure you know about it already. Photography?”

Catra laughed. “Yeah.”

“Can we take a photo? Before you leave?”

Catra let go of Adora, and smiled at her. “Yeah. Before we leave.”

The sun had set, and the merpeople were lighting lanterns around them. The glow suffused the photo as they both stood behind the tracker pad, arms around each other’s shoulders.

Catra stepped towards Scorpia. “Goodbye Adora. I appreciated this.”

As Scorpia and Catra walked away, Adora called out to them. “See you soon.”

Scorpia glared at her, but Catra smiled. “See you soon,” she murmured.

For years after that night, Adora would look at that photo. She showed it to Glimmer when she talked about Catra and her growing up. She showed it to their children when she gave them a first-hand account of the Great Galactic War. But everytime she looked at it, she felt like she was looking at two strangers.

**Author's Note:**

> I kind of hope the show has a happier ending than this, but I think I've heard Noelle say it'd be bittersweet. I've been thinking about them reconciling and becoming friends after they have some character growth, but the thought struck me that maybe all those tweets about crying might be about something a lot harder. Sometimes people just aren't compatible, and they have to go their separate ways. As much as I want to see them reconcile and become best friends, they're so different and this would be an amazingly nuanced portrayal of relationships to show to kids. I won't at all be unhappy if they do end up together, though. Definitely made myself emotional writing this. Heavily inspired by the endings of two of my favorite shows, Bojack Horseman and Six Feet Under. The title is a quote from Six Feet Under, where the main character takes a photograph of her family when she moves away from home. "You can't take a picture of this; it's already gone."


End file.
